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Why am I unhappy?
By Kripalu Bhaktiyoga Tattvadarshan profile image Kripalu Bhaktiyoga Tattvadarshan
4 min read

Why am I unhappy?

यह लेख हिदी में पढ़ें Desires are the root cause of misery. The moment a desire is created in your mind, you have invited unhappiness and dissatisfaction into your life. To an outsider, it may appear that a millionaire is the happiest person in the world with a

Desires are the root cause of misery. The moment a desire is created in your mind, you have invited unhappiness and dissatisfaction into your life.

To an outsider, it may appear that a millionaire is the happiest person in the world with a luxurious home, a high-end car, expensive clothing, and fine jewelry, but in reality, the millionaire is as unhappy and dissatisfied in his quest to acquire more wealth as is a homeless person in his struggle for a good meal and a warm shelter to spend the night. There is no difference in the extent of their dissatisfaction with their respective situations.

The wealthy person loses his sleep over finding ways to preserve and grow his wealth and has to resort to sleep medications to get a good night's sleep, contrary to the homeless person who is happily sleeping on the roadside on a partially full stomach. 

The anxiety and stress experienced by the millionaire for fear of losing his wealth is much higher than that of the homeless person, who has nothing to lose. The wealthy person loses his sleep over finding ways to preserve and grow his wealth and has to resort to sleep medications to get a good night's sleep, contrary to the homeless person who happily sleeps on the roadside on a partially full stomach. 

The fulfillment of a desire leads to greed, while unfulfilled desire leads to anger and frustration. So desires are the root cause of our unhappiness, unfulfillment, and restlessness.

So in our quest for happiness, do we have to give up all desires?  

Yes! if we were to give up all desires, we would no longer be unhappy and dissatisfied, but can we give up our desires? Our scriptures tell us that until we attain that permanent, unlimited happiness our mind cannot give up making desires. The function of the mind is to create desires until it achieves that happiness beyond which there is nothing more to be attained!

Consider for example a person who earns $2000 a month in salary. He wants to make more to live a comfortable life and takes up a second job. Now that he makes $4000 a month with two jobs, he is still not happy and wants to make $8000 a month. The desire for more just keeps growing. 

We fail to introspect and realize that throughout our lives we have been making desires and many of those have been fulfilled, yet we remain unsatisfied. If we ponder over this point deeply, we will realize that even if we were to get all the riches of the world, we would still want to achieve more than what we have. We will still be in the quest for better and more. 

Ever wondered why is that the case? Why is it that the more we get the more we want? When will this desire for more and better be satiated?

Our scriptures tell us that the reason we are never satisfied with whatever we acquire is because all our acquisitions belong to this material world.  Since beginningless time, we have been unsuccessfully searching for happiness in this material world, in relationships, material objects, names, fame, and money. While doing so we are oblivious to the fact that we, the individual souls are a fraction of the divine God and hence divine in nature and would only feel fulfilled upon attaining divine happiness.

God created this world to sustain the body. We need money to buy food, clothing, and shelter required to sustain this body. We must acquire only as much wealth as is required to comfortably sustain the body. Owning too much of it, as well as overuse and misuse of material objects causes further distress. Kunti, the mother of the mighty Pandava brothers prayed to Lord Krishna to give her miseries in life, so she could remember Him. She begged the Lord to not give her any worldly opulence and take away whatever she possesses, lest she forget Him. 

By practicing self-control, we will be able to lead a more peaceful and balanced life. However, this alone will not lead to permanent, everlasting happiness. It is only when we realize that we are the soul and a part of God therefore 

  • we will only be happy by acquiring divine love and 
  • no amount of worldly opulence, name, or fame will make us happy, 

will we attain natural detachment from material objects? These realizations will begin the quest for the source of divine bliss.

💡
जग में न सुख दुख गोविंद राधे ।
मन की आसक्ति सुख दुःख दिला दे ॥
रा. गो. गी. 1472

jaga meṁ na sukha dukha goviṁda rādhe ।
mana kī āsakti sukha duḥkha dilā de ॥
rā. go. gī. 1472

The world is insipid. It has no sorrow or joy. It is the attachment of the mind that gives pleasure and pain.

By Kripalu Bhaktiyoga Tattvadarshan profile image Kripalu Bhaktiyoga Tattvadarshan
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